Just in the past two weeks, I've hit the 50 pound loss marker. I never started this journey thinking that was a possibility. I don't recall this weight or pant size in high school, even. As I close the gap to the ideal weight my doctor suggests for optimal health (we're talking 10-15 pounds!), I stand in awe of a working thyroid. All my efforts to lose weight or be generally healthy actually pay off. I see others who struggle with weight only to meet failure again and again remind me of myself, struggling and wondering what it is we're doing wrong. At some point, each of us with untreated and/or un-diagnosed health issues give up on ever being healthy and feeling well. How unfair!
My sister recently underwent a hysterectomy with one ovary remaining. The details of a growth the size of a volleyball just astounds me. The atrocity itself weighed in at 10 pounds, but as my sister's body has healed from surgery and recovers from an energy-sucking ailment, she finds many parts of her health improve. Without any changes to diet, almost immediately she's lost weight. That one hormonal imbalance caused so many other issues and she proudly explains how she doesn't need daily naps anymore. She no longer needs to sleep her entire first day off, setting an alarm to make dinner, and then having no issue falling right back to sleep after dinner. I've been in that stage myself. It's been three weeks now of a nap-free existence. I understand only too well the glee attached to that simple fact. Having the energy to go through a typical day without exhaustion over-taking you is a miracle.
Recently, my husband remarked that not everyone has the determination to make the health choices that I make daily. My weight loss transformation isn't easy for others to follow. He also recently told me I'm getting too skinny and I can stop losing weight any time now...and then took another breath and added, "but whatever weight you stop at that leaves you healthy is fine by me." My end goal is to be healthy, of course, but I made sure to remind him I had much more motivation to stick to healthy choices because my health had taken such a horrible downward spiral. I never want to return to the days where my health was at it's worse. All by itself, the miserable health I endured before is my daily motivation to make healthy choices each day.
There is a big difference between napping and passing-out napping that those who haven't participated in extremely poor health often don't understand. I couldn't help the napping. My body dragged. The energy to prepare my children for school each day was exhausting. Teaching while sitting on a stool was utterly depleting when it wasn't a very active event. I had the stool as a tool to make it further through the day, honestly. Now, I just make others jealous of my energy levels at work (not on purpose, I'm just a busy-body; if I make others look bad, it's unintentional, I just never was good at sitting still).
So, yes, I celebrate a 50 pound weight loss weighing in at 149 when I never saw anything lower than 164 on my short frame, not even during high school. It's similar to looking at my sister who has looked as if she's lost 25 pounds by having a 10-pound volleyball removed from her abdomen. The change in size and weight is only an outward indication to the world the change in our health. I'm not sure quite what to do with the ocean of compliments. I've always preferred compliments on my teaching or some great idea I've come up with over my physical appearance. It's not an easy path I've had to take. Most people remark they could never give up sugar. Well, you can if you face the health problems I face. If I chose to make one bad food choice, the rest of the day is wrought with horrible symptoms. I easily eat sugar-free, wheat-free, soy-free, and peanut-free because, honestly, I got stuff to do! I won't let bad health hold me back if I have the power to prevent it.
One last piece of advice when it comes to T-day feasts. I've already opted for the easiest menu possible, but there are allowable carbs on the menu along with carbs for the hubby and kids. I've put on the grocery list the ingredients for George Stella's Pecan Pumpkin Streussel Pie because it's a sugar-free, low-carb option (made with a pecan-crust instead of a traditional wheat or graham-cracker crust). I celebrate my health and happily add vegetarian items for my 76 year old Daddy who made his own health choices 30+ years ago to reduce his weight from over 300 pounds to 175. I'm extremely thankful for healthy choices and a new life illness-free. May your holidays be filled with similar sentiments - don't stress overly much about finding the perfect gift. Taking care of yourself and being present and actively participating in life is the best gift.
Happy Holidays!!
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